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What's Happening in:  East Passyunk Crossing 

SoPhilly Spotlight: I Said Goddamn! edition

When we stumbled across this listing, the words in the post’s title erupted from our mouths, a la Mia Wallace in Pulp Fiction. It’s that good.

A converted firehouse at 808 Morris St., this property listed by Howard Hanna Realty has a jaw-dropping 6,000 square feet, 4BR, 3 full baths, parking for four cars, skylights galore and a huge interior courtyard. All for only $399,999. Maybe it’s not on Juniper Street, but it puts the half-million dollar Liberace pad we featured a few weeks ago to shame.

Beautiful

Of course there’s a catch. The listing says it needs to be completed, but you could live in the pictured areas just fine while you finish up.

High ceilings on each floor, open floor-plan, and outrageous details make this property a potential palace close to Passyunk Square.

And how. We’ll take it in two shakes of a lamb’s tail.

Back to the kitchen. I guess this is the dining room, living is the sunken lower level on the left?
Little confused about the configuration
That’ll do, pig. That’ll do. Wait, that’s not from Pulp Fiction
Live in here while you finish the rest
6,000 square feet and your bathroom is this tiny?
Well that’s the nicest laundry chute I ever did see
C’mon people. Mow before you take a picture
That’s where my Ferraris would go
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So, this is a little out of our coverage area…

But what the hell. It’s Friday, and you ain’t got shit to do.

For a good laugh, or just to get a little angry, check out this tumblr account run by Esquire magazine: Rich Kids of Instagram. The scions and princesses of corporate royalty cavort like no one else – taking champagne showers, or posing on the hood of their Bentleys. All the while, we get to laugh at them, long for something else and question where our parents went wrong. At least they’re all dead inside.

Jerks
That’s in Euros, no less
Yachts were boring before this
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Hmm. Do you like or dislike litter?

Judging by the comments on our story last week about the trash cans getting taken away, we figured that you guys are pretty passionate about stopping litter.

One of the best ways to cut down on litter on your block is to get this sticker by filling out this formand mailing it to: Kathleen DuBeck  Licenses & Inspections  Municipal Services Building  1401 John F. Kennedy Blvd. Room 1130. Or fax it to 215-686-1411.Slap that sucker on your front door and you’ll be surprised at the difference. We here at Passyunk Post world headquarters and a few neighbors got stickers, and the litter on the street dipped by half. No more menus caked into gutters after it rains. No more coupon circulars in those white bags blowing around on the street. The thing works.

There have been a few brazen bastards who defied the sticker, but one call to 311 and they never did it again. The city sends the offender up to two warnings, then fines them up to a $150. Just save your 311 reference number. Happy cleaning.

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What's Happening in:  East Passyunk Crossing 

Ugly Furniture! Hysterical video about Interior Concepts

As window displays go, the lucite nightmare at Interior Concepts furniture store at EPA and Morris takes the cake. Ceramic sax players, crystaline coffee tables, purple metal dining sets that would be at home on the set of Beetlejuice — you name it, they got it when it comes to awful furniture.

Actually, though, the store has a lot of great stuff inside, deep in the back, away from the prying eyes of passersby. Full disclosure: The world headquarters of the Passyunk Post has a very nice sectional couch from IC.
Incidentally, the building had a for sale sign but it was taken down and no sale has been recorded with the city, which says it was last sold in 1996. And we couldn’t find a real-estate listing anywhere.
But really, this post was an excuse to put that video out there.
Deep inside, good taste hides
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What's Happening in:  East Passyunk Crossing 

Tomorrow’s the night for King of Jeans meeting – we promise

Despite what you may have read last week (oops), the developer planning apartments for the King of Jeans building is going before the East Passyunk Crossing zoning committee tomorrow night to present his proposals.

Developer Max Glass wants to convert the 2nd, 3rd and 4th floors into 12 apartments with retail on the first floor. He needs a variance because zoning only allows six apartments, so head to the EPX center at 1729 S 11th St. at 7 p.m. to show your support. The sale of the 10,000 square foot building, which was most recently listed for $819,900, hasn’t been finalized, so neighborhood support is key.

Just like last week, we’re still not sure what they plan to do with the glorious King of Jeans sign. Meanwhile, everything must go at the store, so if you want oversized jeans, used bikes, antique furniture, or need to sell your stuff on eBay, time’s running out.
Where did he get those fetching jeans? Oh
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What's Happening in:  Passyunk Square 

Garage shoots for Nov.1 opening date – and they might actually make it

Jason Evenchik, owner of the upcoming Garage across from Geno’s, got back to us after we raised the question of all that dirt that was piled in front of the propertya couple weeks ago. He told us that the building’s owner had to do some soil samples before they could continue, but the big news is that Garage is coming a lot sooner than you think.

Evenchik said they’re hoping to start building in a couple weeks and are shooting for a Nov. 1 opening date. That’s actually more doable than it sounds because they plan to preserve the concrete floors and walls and really only need to build the bar and bathrooms. Permits are ready to go.

The place will be huge. They’re keeping those steel beams exposed.

The set-up will be slightly different from what we first reported (that there will be food trucks and a set menu). Actually, a customized food cart will be a permanent fixture inside, running on natural gas.

“As far as the food truck operators,” Evenchik said in a phone interview, “we’re gonna rotate them through. We’ll book ’em like bands. Monday might be Korean tacos, Tuesday might be Tyson Bees, Wednesday maybe Trinidadian food [Mini Trini].”

The truck operators will prep off site and sling their grub from the cart, so there won’t be a line of trucks out front. “They’ll be like guest chefs,” Evenchik said. Partner Josh McCullough is working with the Philly Mobile Food Association and the Food Trust, which runs the Night Markets, to set the schedule.

Inside, think industrial warehouse for the look, about 50 seats, 150 beers in cans only, a handful of affordable wines and a full bar, plus TVs playing Phils and Eagles. So is it a sports bar?

“More like a man den, couple pool tables, foosball, skeeball. Games to play and things to do as well. Kind of like what we do at Bar on a larger scale with more room.” At just under 3,000 square feet, it’s much more than Bar, one of Evenchik and his wife Delphine’s three places near 13th and Sansom. The others are wine bar Vintage (beware automatic, jazzy music on the website) and whiskey/music bar Time. Another, Growler in the old Vesuvio space in Bella Vista, is planned for next month.

A clear garage door on the front will slide open in nice weather, giving the place an inside-outside feel. “People watching down in that area is pretty phenomenal,” said Evenchik, who lives nearby on 10th Street. “We all live in South Philly.” The other partners are Terrance Leach and Sal D’Amato.

Imagine it with a clear garage door, and without all that pink shit 

They’ll open seven days a week, from about 4 p.m. to 2 a.m., opening earlier on game days, with food the whole time. Outside cheesesteaks will also be allowed in, though Evenchik said the “target market is not the cheesesteak tourist crowd. Its people living in South Philly.”

Another plus? He’s keeping your wallet in mind. “We want it to be somewhere you can go if you want Oskar Blues [Dale’s Pale Ale, etc.] brew or Colorado crafts or if you want PBR and Narragansett. It’ll definitely be affordable. Somewhere you can hang out – a lot.”
OK, you twisted my arm.
The pile that piqued our curiosity
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